"Convict him, Lord." Seems harsh, huh? But that was the extent of a recent prayer.
God had an incredible plan and lesson for one of our children. Well, okay, maybe there was a lesson for me too.
As our kids get older, we release more freedom and responsibility. What they do with that freedom and responsibility determines how much more they may have. I'd have to say that this incident was the first one that really caused me anguish as this wasn't just an issue of trusting them to walk across the street by themselves, but one of spiritual significance.
We had given guidance to this child to help make a decision that we felt would be most beneficial for their spiritual well-being. But it was guidance, not a mandate. It was an opportunity for their faith to become more of their own.
Naively, I walked away from the conversation assuming this precious child would do just as we had suggested. When I later discovered this wasn't the case, I was broken-hearted. And then, I prayed, "Convict him, Lord." Short and to the point. It was all I could muster. My first reaction was to chasten him, but I heard the Lord say, "not this time." I felt helpless, but I knew I could pray.
The next morning, minutes befor church is to start, my dear child asks if we can talk. The two of us go outside. Mind you, I'm focused on church starting so I'm not thinking about the events of the previous night. Now it's my turn to see a broken heart. The tears come and the confession that the wrong choice was made. It's important to know at this point that our issue was over the appropriateness of a certain book. Why? Because the same day the book was purchased, our family had an in depth conversation about the devastating effects of a specific sin which happened to be the same issue that arose in the book! I couldn't believe it! Well, I could because I know how awesome our God is. I shared with our child that this wasn't all a coincidence and that we could see God's loving hand woven through the whole situation. There was no doubt, in either party, that this was a divine intervention.
God was teaching our beloved child a lesson of faith, trust, obedience, and His sovereignty. The timing of our conversation, the purchase of the book, etc. couldn't have been arranged better. He allowed that conversation because He knew the choice our child would make. He knew He was going to weave it all together to draw our child to Him. He knew what was best. He loved my child in a way I couldn't.
Lessons for me?.....
I hear my Lord asking me, "Do you trust me?"
I hear my Lord saying, "Do you believe I hear you?"
I hear my Lord comfort me, "I've heard your cry. I love you. Rest in me."
Lord, hear me.....I am Yours.
